Count your blessings.

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You know, I have had a pretty shitty year.  And over this last weekend I wallowed in self-pity and said a thousand woe-is-me’s.  Today, I am so sick of myself and my pity-party!

Today, I am going to find the blessings in all of the events over this year.  Yea, yea, I know.  It is only October.  How can I possibly be wanting this year to be over already, right?  Aren’t we always told that tomorrow is a new day?  Aren’t we supposed to get a fresh new start every morning?  Isn’t that what all the positive self-image people say?

Well, I think I need to take full advantage of those fresh new starts and new days – right now!

So, at the first of the year, I decided to start a Plus Sized Fashion Blog.  Came up with a name and an idea and started writing and taking pictures and buying clothes and buying clothes and buying clothes.  Oh, and did I mention that I started buying clothes.  Well, needless to say, a maxed out credit card later, I am no longer “starting” anything.  I am done buying clothes and shoes and anything else remotely related to fashion.  I do, however, have a very well stocked wardrobe from which to draw my clothing ideas from for the rest of the year or two.  Ding!  Blessing!

The blessing in disguise is that now I have to tell myself no.  I have to discipline myself to not go binge shopping.  I have to be frugal and show self-restraint.  But, it also makes me really think about whether I need something or not.  Or if I can come up with something similar in my current wardrobe with a couple of tweeks here and there.

The blog itself has morphed into this online journal, of sorts.  Ding! Blessing! A wonderful release for me with a little entertainment for you, my few followers and readers.  I think that is a blessing too, really.  The less people I think are reading my blogs, the more honest I tend to be.

Even though I did not become this big Stylist like I wanted to.  I did hook up with an incredible group of women in the Common Bond Christian Women’s Job Corp.  I get to host an image workshop and share all the knowledge that I gained over the years about fashion and dressing. Ding! Blessing!

This year, my daughter graduated from high school and my son from elementary school.  May was supposed to be this wonderful month of joy and family gatherings.  Instead, we had a tornado rip through the neighborhood on April 27, 2011.  Thankfully, no one was killed in our neighborhood – Ding! Blessing!  And our house was not seriously damaged – Ding! Blessing!  The neighbors all pulled together and helped each other – Ding! Blessing!  And the kids got out of school and finals a week early, but still got to graduate – Ding! Blessing!  By the time the graduations rolled around, the power, phone and cable were all back on – Ding! Blessing!  And we still got to gather with family and friends to celebrate – Ding! Blessing!

My mother decided that she did not want me relying on her for friendship or have a relationship with me or my children – Ding! Blessing!  I know, I know, you are saying, “Whaaattt?”  I said, Ding! Blessing!  She is a manipulative, passive-aggressive Bitch and we are better off without her being around to wreak her havoc on our lives.

Over the summer, I lost 2 very dear friends to me.  They both had health issues.  They both were not doing well.  I will miss them terribly.  There isn’t a whole lot of blessing I can find in losing either of them, but I am trying.  Now I can be assured that they will no longer be sick or hurting.  Their families can find comfort in that too. Ding. Blessing.  I am finding a strength inside myself to cope and deal with losing friends that I never knew I had. Ding. Blessing.

The whole contractor fiasco has taught me that I can do alot more handyman things around this house than I thought I could.  That has given me confidence in being a home owner. Ding! Blessing!  I am being forced to tackle a project that I really didn’t think i could handle – but I guess we are fixin’ to find out if I am up to the task.

So, even though I have had some pretty big obstacles and problems thrown my way, I just keep reminding myself that God never gives us more than we can handle, that there is always a lesson to be learned and that if you try, you can find the blessings in the tragedy of life.

What about you?  What blessings have you found in the awful things that have happened in your life?

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